She was tired of her sister-in-law’s constant meddling with her meals. So, she decided to take matters into her own hands and told her brother that the two were no longer welcome at her house. But was this too harsh a response? Here’s the full story, as told on Reddit:
The Background
The Original Poster (OP) starts by explaining she has a SIL who’s about five years older than her. They get on well, apart from one recurring problem.
Whenever the SIL visits, she goes into OP’s kitchen and, without asking permission, adds seasoning to whatever’s cooking. SIL says she’s trying to help. But, as OP puts it, “not all foods need turmeric in it.”
OP Was Making a Tomato Sauce
The proverbial s*** hit the fan last weekend, after OP had spent the weekend making a sauce out of 40lbs of tomatoes. She’d just wanted a plain tomato sauce that she was going to can. Unfortunately, her SIL had other ideas…
Her SIL Interfered…Again
While the sauce was cooking, OP’s older brother and SIL (his wife) came over to collect some clothes for one of their children. It took OP 5 minutes to go and grab them, in which time her SIL went into the kitchen and added a whole bunch of different herbs and spices to the 5 pots of sauce simmering on the stove.
OP Was Furious
Needless to say, OP wasn’t happy. And it got worse when she asked SIL what she was doing. Her response? “This sauce needed some taste, I added it for you,” as if OP had never instructed her to leave her cooking alone before.
She Banned Her From the House
OP was so livid that she knew she’d snap at her SIL if they kept talking. She went over to her brother instead, telling him they should both leave and that his wife wasn’t welcome in her house anymore.
The Punishment Continued
Her SIL heard this and tried to apologize, but OP was fed up. She ignored her, telling her brother that a) he should return the next day to collect the sauce SIL had ruined, otherwise she’d chuck it out, and b) she wanted 40lbs of replacement tomatoes.
They Apologized
OP’s brother returned with three things: the replacement tomatoes, an apology letter from SIL, and her favorite cake to augment the apology. It was a nice gesture, but not enough to make OP change her mind.
Did OP Overreact?
OP’s husband is on her side, but her parents – who soon became aware of the situation – think she overreacted. That’s why she turned to Reddit for a second opinion. Was she in the wrong? Was it a step too far to ban her SIL from the house?
Reddit Doesn’t Think So
Most people on Reddit thought the only person in the wrong was her SIL. The top comment said, “This is so boundary disrespecting, disrespectful and INSULTING to what you’re cooking. And it wasn’t even for HER!!” They continued that OP was right to be furious, but that at least it seemed like her SIL had learnt her lesson.
Broken Boundaries
Many people noted how the SIL’s behavior was a gross violation of OP’s boundaries. One popular comment read, “She’s crossing boundaries, poking into something where she doesn’t belong. There’s all kinds of wrong with messing with someone else’s cooking – what if you were making something for someone allergic to turmeric?”
At Least They Apologized
On the positive side, people were pleased that OP’s brother and her SIL had apologized for what happened. However, they recommended caution, too.
The previous Redditor continued, “If you are thinking about letting her back in, I’d make sure the apology is a real apology first. Not “I’m sorry if your feelings were hurt”, but something which takes responsibility for her actions. “I added seasoning to your giant tomato sauce project without asking; this was out of line and I shouldn’t have done it. It’s my fault, and I’m sorry. In the future, I’m planning to not enter your kitchen unless invited.””
What Do You Think?
Do you have any thoughts on this story? Do you think OP overreacted to what her SIL did? Or was her reaction perfectly proportionate and justified? Drop a comment with your thoughts.
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Source: Reddit.