While the emphasis on female empowerment in today’s world is wholly justified, let’s not forget some of the unique challenges men face. A user on Quora recently asked, “What’s something that sucks about being a man?” We’ve compiled a list of the most interesting and popular responses among the countless ones on the thread:
10. Judgment on Wearing Makeup
One man described a bet he’d lost with some female co-workers. His punishment? He had to let them put makeup on him and he wasn’t allowed to take it off all day. The good news was that they were “nice” and only put mascara on. And it got even better when he realized he looked in the mirror and realized his “eyes looked really damn good.”
Unfortunately, he started getting lots of funny looks and mocking comments out in public. The thing that sucks about being a man? “Apparently us guys can’t spruce our eyes up without being judged in public.”
9. Teased For Getting Hurt
An anonymous Quora user came in with this story of a male friend who was derided for getting his nose broken by his girlfriend:
“I used to be friends with a guy who was a national level judo competitor. He and his girlfriend are playing around one day and she “puts them up” – hands in a boxing stance. So he jokingly puts his hands up. She swings and breaks his nose. For months afterwards, not only was he teased and taunted by most of his friends, family, trainers, competitors, her family and friends but by his girlfriend all the “yeah, don’t make me break your nose again” kind of teasing. Can you imagine if the genders had been reversed?
8. Not Getting What You Want
Another anonymous user bemoaned the fact his wife always seems to get what she wants. The example he gave happened on a recent flight, where they both wanted the window seat. After a brief argument, she started crying, so he gave in and took the aisle.
7. Being Objectified
One poster (who was a woman) pointed out that it’s far more socially acceptable for women to objectify men than the other way around. She told a story of a school field trip to Mexico and a visit to a restaurant where the waiters were all good-looking guys. She wrote:
“All the girls were purposely dropping their silverware to see them bend and pick them up. Some even whistled quietly as they passed by. I could clearly tell they felt uncomfortable, but they had to put up with these annoying teenage girls. I can imagine if the waiters were girls, they might have said something back to the customers.”
6. Being Expected to Pay
One Quora response talked about a recent lunch date with a female friend. She’d asked him to go out, she’d made the orders, he didn’t actually eat anything, and she asked the waiter for the check. When it came, though, the waiter handed it straight to him – so he paid. He wrote, “Always being expected to pay is definitely something that sucks about being a man. Especially when you didn’t eat anything.”
5. Getting Hit in the Knackers
One dad recounted the funny tale of his daughter who’d been taking karate classes. When she wanted to show him the snap kick, he put his hand out and told her to “gimme your best shot.” She obliged happily, but missed and caught him square in the groin. As he puts it, “Unfortunately for us guys, even mighty Thor would drop to his Asgard if [his daughter] kicked him in the hammer.”
4. Double Standards Around Cheating
Someone else talked about the reaction from a few people after his wife had an affair and he’d decided to leave her. The first issue was that they assumed he’d been the one to cheat. Then, when he corrected them, they told him he must have done something wrong to deserve it.
He wrote, “So, that’s a double standard that I’ve lived through and find unfair; if I had cheated I would’ve been labelled a creep/jerk, when she has an affair I’m still somehow a jerks who is to blame?”
3. Law Enforcement Siding Automatically With Women Re Abuse
This is a very contentious topic, but one man pointed out that:
- Law enforcement will tend to instantly side with women if/when they claim to be a victim of abuse (that’s serious and scary power in the wrong hands) and
- Men abused by women are often not seen/treated as victims; they’re often shamed instead.
In a long story of how they’ve suffered in this way, they wrote: “The fact that women have that power over men is, by far, the absolute s******** part of being a man. I was stuck in an abusive and manipulative relationship and felt like I had no way out, all because the legal system typically works against men.”
2. Less Physical Contact
Another Quora user pointed out that, compared to women, societal norms make it harder for men to get the physical contact they need as a human.
For example, “It’s socially acceptable for women to hug…or to place their hands on each other’s hands as reassurance, or brush each other’s hair. Women can also, without judgement nor the suspicion of s***** motivation, ask for hugs, etc from male friends if feeling upset, friendly, or just because. Men, on the other hand, often cannot. Physical contact with women outside of a relationship is often seen as creepy, flirtatious, or just ‘weak.’ Physical contact with men, apart from the occasional handshake, is viewed as strange [or] awkward.”
1. Being a Single Dad
One man explained at length some of the trials and tribulations he’d experienced raising his son as a single dad. From having no access to public baby changing facilities (they were all in women’s toilets) and being unable to attend kid’s play sessions (because there was no mother/woman present) to getting odd looks from hotel workers when taking his son to their room, there were no shortage of hurdles to overcome.
Can You Think of Any Others?
Are there any other problems with being a man in today’s world? What stands out? Anything that bugs you above all else? Drop a comment to let us know.
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