Ever wondered if someone you know is hiding their true colors? Well, Reddit users have spilled the beans on signs that indicate someone’s not as good as they seem. So, brace yourself as we dive into this list of 14 lesser-known red flags that may reveal a person’s darker side:
14. The Lack Of Curiosity
“To quote Ted Lasso, “be curious, not judgmental”.
“100%! I cannot stand speaking to someone who is clearly disinterested in the topic and doesn’t even pretend to be curious.”
13. They See Kindness As A Weakness
“I would add to that anyone who categorizes normal things as weaknesses to be looked down on. Someone who’s overly concerned with being strong over being weak in an abstract sense. I would add to that anyone who categorizes normal things as weaknesses to be looked down on. Someone who’s overly concerned with being strong over being weak in an abstract sense.”
“My former best friend thought taking any kind of prescription drug for mental illness was a weakness. Even antidepressants. Which I take.”
12. They’re Never At Fault
“All their problems are someone else’s fault. All their bosses are [awful]. All his exes are crazy. All her exes are abusive.”
“It’s my ex. She told me once that I was just on the list of evil men she somehow keeps dating. I asked her if she didn’t see the common denominator. She has very serious issues. She justified terrible, abusive behavior. It always made sense. She cheats, lies, manipulates, etc. I can’t believe I stayed for as long as I did and fell under that spell. I straight up believed her.”
11. They’re Narcissists
“I can write a para relating to a narcissist who was once a ‘friend.’ This kind of person starts by: 1. Love bombing 2. Slowly breaking down and pushing your boundaries… 3. They set ultimatums when you stand firm on your boundaries. 4. They take your insecurities and magnify them. 5. They blame their [nasty] behavior on alcohol or being drunk. In my opinion, that is when a person is most honest. 6. They say sorry just to get you and the benefits they received from you back into their life… 7. They play mind games – they start gaslighting, making you doubt yourself, victimizing themselves even though they are in the wrong.”
10. They Lack Kindness and Empathy In General
“This is someone very close to me. They lack empathy, and they aren’t malicious and evil and whatnot. It seems as if they are completely unable to understand other people’s emotions even if they sincerely try, like trying to solve a math problem, but you get it wrong every time.”
“I think they lack compassion. A truly manipulative person often has a lot of empathy because it’s necessary to understand how others think and feel to manipulate them in the first place. I think that’s where people get confused with people on the spectrum and the stereotype that they “lack empathy.” Yes, they sometimes do – but that doesn’t mean they lack compassion.”
9. They Litter the Environment
“I kicked a friend out of my car and left him MILES from his house because he threw his McDonald’s bag out the window. He was so confused, “What’s the problem? They pay people to clean it up”. ************, we aren’t in California, and you know who pays them? Us, you ****, it’s called taxes. That’s not even the POINT. Anyway, we’re chill to this day. He has never littered again.”
8. They Make Sure You Know About Their Charitable Nature
“I know a wealthy woman who incessantly posts about her donations and kind gestures on her social media. Meanwhile, she is hyper-judgmental, manipulative, vain, and materialistic in person. Also, my former brother-in-law would humble-brag about raising money for his sister’s charity, then make a transparently fake display of crying and becoming emotional at every benefit.”
7. They’re Too Full of Themselves
“I actually met someone who said “I’m a smart and lovely person” then went on and on about how awesome they are, then repeated “I’m so smart, I’m so lovely…” while everyone else is evil, stupid, greedy,…”
“I had a friend like this. She told a guy on a first date how lucky he was to be on a date with her. She said this repeatedly until he called her out on it. Then she got annoyed that he didn’t contact her again.”
6. They’re Always the Victim
“This is how my dad is, and he is a narcissist. Be careful with these people because they will never change unless some miracle happens and they become sane.”
“I know a couple of people like this. They have fallen out with all of the friends they have ever had, but of course, it’s always everyone else’s fault!”
5. They Mistreat Animals
“I would go so far as to say “indifference to animals.” If you don’t care about endangered animals or the ethical treatment of animals, you are a garbage human being.”
“I don’t think people realize how sinister people who hate animals are. I was going on a hike with my friend. A dead lizard was on the road, so I brushed it off the path with a leaf so it wouldn’t get run over or mangled by something. Just to preserve its dignity. My friend starts laughing at me, acting like I’m so weird.”
4. They Can’t Think About Problems Beyond They’re Own
“Someone I know seemed emotionally vulnerable and deeply sensitive, but after years, it became apparent that only his problems mattered to him…he’d immediately dismiss anyone else’s struggles…I don’t understand how anyone who claims to suffer so much cannot empathize with those with similar or worse struggles. It feels so horrible to treat suffering as a ‘d**k measuring contest’ where you get jealous and dismissive of somebody who has it worse than you.”
3. They Never Celebrate Other People’s Success
“This is my dad throughout my whole life. Recently, I bought a house with my husband, and when we excitedly told my parents, my dad just went on about how it’s a horrible time to buy a house, and the interest rates are through the roof and on and on. Ruined our moods.”
“My ex-BFF was like this. She always had to one-up me and treat everything like a competition. She always had to knock me down a peg. She was an emotional vampire.”
2. They Never Take Accountability For Mistakes
“My roommate is a genuinely good person, but grew up around people like that. And because he has autism, he thinks that’s how apologies sound. “I’m sorry if it seems I did that,” or “Sorry you took offense to that.” It’s been an upward climb getting him to understand that’s not what a real apology sounds like. Because sure, while I know he has good intentions, no one else will take it that way.”
“I had a friend who had cheated on every partner she had had when we were friends, most recently being with a married man. When I told her I was done listening to the drama she created, I was the bad person. I don’t miss her using me as a therapist for the problems she created for herself.”
1. They Take Advantage of People
“Had a boss like this. Targeted and bullied weak/new/green employees, always had to be the smartest in the room, bragged, accused people of being gay, massive mood swings. Guy’s heart is black.”
“I confronted a friend recently about how she’s been treating me like a therapist. Mind you, we fought over this a few years ago, and it was handled poorly initially. She said she knew she was doing it again but waited for me to bring it up. I jokingly asked her why she didn’t stop if she was self-aware, and she replied with a laugh, “That’s your problem.” I am the one to blame for giving, but damn, I usually ask for feedback if I become too much to people, so I don’t push the line.”
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Source: Reddit.