A young man has turned to Reddit about a problem that’s been brewing with his roommate. Unfortunately, the Southern hospitality he shows to the roommate’s girlfriend seems to rub him up the wrong way. Is he overstepping? Or is his roommate being childish? Here’s the story:
The original poster (OP) begins by explaining they grew up in the south. He was brought up in the kitchen, cooking delicious southern fare with his mom. He’s now at culinary school on the east coast, honing his craft.
He Has a Roommate
OP’s been renting a house with another guy of a similar age (early twenties). They’re not friends per se, but they get on well mostly and hang out together on a semi-frequent basis. OP’s more of an introvert naturally, but he’s got that classic Southern charm that makes it easy to make friends. As it happens, that might be part of the problem that’s developed recently…
His Roommate Has a Girlfriend
His roommate has been dating a girl for the last 6 months. OP’s met her once and twice before, but she just ended up staying with them for 2 entire weeks during a school break. No problem. OP just got on with things as he normally would. But then his roommate started being weird…
Odd Encounters Ensued
The first odd encounter came when OP went to mow the lawn – a job he always does. His roommate stopped him from doing it, saying he wanted to mow instead.
Then, a day or two later, OP was washing his car. Out of kindness, he offered to wash their cars (the roommate’s and his girlfriend’s) too. It seemed like she was going to take him up on the offer, but the roommate gave her a death stare so they declined.
The Weirdness Continued
Things only got worse from there. As you might expect from someone at culinary school, OP cooks a lot at home and often lets his roommate help himself to whatever he’s made. However, whenever OP offered food to the roommate and his girlfriend, he’d just get angry.
It’s Just How OP Was Raised
OP wasn’t doing anything out of the ordinary. He was being kind and offering to help because that’s how he was raised. For example, when his roommate’s girlfriend had visited them a few weeks prior, she’d mentioned that she loves a particular type of cheesecake. Remembering this, OP decided to make it for everyone while she was staying with them. Once again, this didn’t go down will with the roommate.
He’s Not Trying to Make Anyone Look Bad
OP’s treating the roommate’s girlfriend as he would any other guest. But it seems like they interpret it the wrong way, as if OP’s trying to make him look bad.
For instance, he baked fresh bread and left it out for everyone to enjoy. His roommate said how annoying it was to hear his girlfriend talking about how good it tasted. And he had a similar reaction when OP: asked if anyone wanted anything from the grocery store, offered the girlfriend the best bits from the pan when he was frying up some chicken, and even when he changed his car’s oil.
Time For a New Roommate?
To begin with, OP didn’t think too much of his roommate’s complaints. After all, he tries to see the best in people. Yet now that’s beginning to change. He “feels like [he] can’t even exist while [the girlfriend] is here” because his roommate’s getting so annoyed at everything. Heck, OP recently got a text from them saying it’s bad that he looks in the girl’s eyes when they’re talking…
Reddit’s Firmly On His Side
OP turned to Reddit to see whether people thought he was doing anything wrong. Spoiler alert: they definitely didn’t. The final verdict came out firmly on OP’s side. His roommate was just frustrated by how high OP was setting the bar. Here’s what people had to say:
He’s Being Ridiculous
The most upvoted comment said, “You are raising a bar he doesn’t want raised by getting things done. He wants to pretend he is a better partner than he is. He also doesn’t want you to highlight things he isn’t interested in doing. In a way, you are unintentionally showing that he isn’t the best partner material around. Keep doing as you are. He is being ridiculous.”
Others Want OP In Their Family
One Redditor chimed in with a tongue-in-cheek request: “Hello, my wife (38f) and I (42f) are looking to onboard an additional son, and especially a son-chef. We have two now, ages 2 and 4. They are very into bread and sometimes other foods. They will watch shows with you (big into Spiderman)…I think my family is a much better fit than your current roommate.”
The Roommate’s Scared
Others thought the roommate was just jealous and insecure. One wrote:
“So he’s okay with you feeding him, but has a problem when you offer to feed his gf who just happens to be in the house. It’s not like you only cook when she’s there. Why? Is he afraid you’re gonna steal her with food?…You sound like a great roomie. You mow and offered to wash their cars? Who does that? You’re like southern hospitality on steroids.”
Who’s In the Wrong?
What do you think? Is OP overstepping a line by treating his roommate’s girlfriend so nicely? Should he take a step back and respect what they’re saying? Or is the roommate being childish? Are they just annoyed about being shown up in front of their gf? Is the onus on them to step up? Drop a comment with your thoughts.
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